Just Say It
by matsujunchann
Summary: Asuma has fallen. The shocking news was spread through the neighbor countries at the speed of light. The first thing Temari did was to pack and leave… even though she clearly told him that she wouldn’t be coming back.


Disclaimer: Nothing you might recognize is mine.

Title: Just Say It

Summary: ** Asuma has fallen. The shocking news was spread through the neighbor countries at the speed of light. The first thing Temari did was to pack and leave… even though she clearly told him that she wouldn't be coming back.**

**Characters: Temari, Shikamaru, Asuma.**

* * *

"_Okay, here it is, your choice... it's simple, **her** or **me**, and I'm sure she is really great. But Shikamaru, **I love you**… and I don't want second places…"_

* * *

Veins of lightning lit the clouds, dancing whips of white-hot energy lighting up the midnight sky. The tall slender figure readjusted the raincoat as she gritted her teeth. A gust of wind slapped a hank of her blonde hair across her face as she pushed herself forward, ignoring the furious rain. She closed her eyes slightly, brushed a hand through her face and swayed away a few strands of her hair. Her heart was pounding hard against her chest. It made her wonder if it was going to break through her ribs and jump straight into the muddy ground.

What am I doing? Temari thought bitterly as her teal eyes stared at the tall gates in front of her. She bit hard into her quivering lower lip as she came to a sudden stop. She had acted so recklessly, leaving like that. It was so unlike her. Normally, she would evaluate the situation, think about it and then opt for the right decision. And the right decision was not to return to this damned place. A cold shiver ran up and down her spine, licking her skin, making her tremble slightly. This was also so unlike her. The blonde-haired Kunoichi could take anything that was thrown at her, enemy Shinobi, whatever it was, she could handle.

However, he was… different. He held her powerlessly against his invisible spider web. She was the prey and he was the hunter. She didn't like that. No. She hated to feel so vulnerable. So damn weak.

"Kami… what am I doing?" she whispered against the wind as droplets of rain showered her tanned features.

* * *

"_I don't know what to say to you…" he paused and slowly lowered his head, fixing his dark eyes on his feet._

"_Oh God, don't play the victim." Temari felt like hitting him. "She was flirting. She was all over you with a stupid smile on her face, batting her eyelashes at you." _

"_You would know," he muttered into his chest, not looking at her._

_She stood up straight, indignation washing over her. "What is that supposed to mean?" He shrugged as he shoved his hands deeper inside his pockets. "I have never flirted in my life," she sniffed, stepping aside._

"_Uh-huh."_

_Temari stood across from him and pinned him with a glare. "I mean it. If you think I'm a flirt you're crazy."_

"_I didn't say you were." He refused to look at her, staring hard at everything else around them._

"_Yes, you did. And you did it just to insult me," She huffed. _

_He straightened himself, abandoning the comfort of the tree he was leaning against. He sighed softly, "Okay, fine. Then what do you call last night, besides flirting? Huh?"_

"_I don't know what you're talking about." She looked away, locking her eyes at the walking girls._

"_You do too."_

_She breathed in. "I wasn't flirting, how can you even say that?"_

"_Right, you kissed me, remember?" He rolled his eyes. "And that wasn't flirting?"_

"_Shut up," she snapped, putting her back to him. He did shut up, but she could feel him watching her. _

_Shikamaru sighed as he looked at her back, "Okay, I'm sorry," he said, and even though she wouldn't look at him, she could hear the eye-roll in his tone. She tilted her nose in the air and stared ahead with her eyes half closed_

"_Say something." He placed his hand over her shoulder._

_She shrugged it away. "Don't touch me."_

"_Temari, come on." He reached out again._

_She turned on him and knocked his hand away, ignoring the pain that shot through the side of her hand as it contacted his wrist. "I said don't touch me!" she seethed, "You don't think I mean what I say? Am I flirting now?" He winced and stepped back, but she persisted, stalking forward as she hissed, "Do you really think that I'm just playing games every time I've yelled at you and told you I'm pissed off in so many words?"_

"_No! I—"_

"_Then what?" She dug her hands into her hips and glared with all her might. "You have never taken anything I've said seriously. Ever."_

_He took a deep breath and stared at the sky a moment before replying: "That's not true."_

_His measured response just made her angrier. "Liar!" she spat. "It is! You always just smile at me like a big dope; 'Oh, you're so funny when you're mad; tell another joke'—" she shoved him in the chest with both hands as hard as she could; he stumbled back. "Well, am I funny now?"_

"_Te—"_

"_Don't 'Temari' me!" She shoved him again. "Am I funny now?"_

"_No." He held up his hands, cringing._

"_Good! I'm glad!" She waved her hands threateningly. "And you can forget about last night, because it's never going to happen again. I won't make the same mistake twice. I won't . . . ." She paused, trying to calm down. "You won't catch me flirting again; be sure of that."_

* * *

Temari sniffed and shuddered at the sudden memory. She overreacted that day. She snapped and her self-control escaped right between her fingers. She had clearly let him know her feelings then… and also how jealous she was of his annoying teammate. She shook her head slightly as she felt her cheeks become hot. How foolish of her. It was so embarrassing to even remember.

She sighed. She was not going to back down now. Temari took a step forward, feeling how her legs were shaking slightly. It was as though they were fighting against her, forbidding her to walk any further.

The Kunoichi finally reached Konoha gates. The gate keepers looked at her with surprised looks stamped on their faces. Then again, she used to visit every other month but… ever since that day she has never visited once. "Temari-san." A tall dark-skinned Shinobi smiled softly after he recovered from the initial surprise, "It's good to see you again."

Temari nodded shortly, "Thank you." she forced a smile into her face as she walked past them.

* * *

"_Come on, Temari." He stalked over her, his hand snaked around her wrist with bruising force, making her cry out in surprise. _

_"Let go Shikamaru!" she demanded harshly, glaring fiercely at him. _

"_This is not fair." He said sighing in exasperation as she yanked her arm away from him. _

_Temari held her breath as she stared at him. His dark eyes were clouded with something that even she couldn't read. "It is fair." She answered, swallowing dry, "It's an easy answer, Shikamaru."_

"_She's my teammate."_

"_She is in love with you."_

_Silence._

_She didn't need to stay any longer. She turned her back on him and walked straight ahead. "Just so you know…" she whispered as she stopped briefly. She looked over her shoulder, her teal eyes prickling with tears… that she would never allow to fall down, "I'm never coming back."_

* * *

And yet there she was… staring at the wooden door of his apartment. Her gaze slowly drifted away from the door, toward the window. The lights were turned on but she couldn't see any movement at all. Her heart is hammering, accompanying the sound of the wild wind and furious rain. The three of them seemed to be in sync. Her lips parted and she sucked in the maximum amount of air as possible. Temari stepped forward, her sandals echoing into the rainy dark night. She suddenly stopped in mid-way. Her heart came to a sudden stop, her eyes widened and she forgot how to breathe as the door was slowly opened. Her eyes stopped on his naked feet, his dark blue pants and at his naked chest… and finally on his features.

"Are you going to stay there all night?" Shikamaru asked, his long forgotten voice echoed inside her head relieving her somehow.

Temari nodded slightly and stepped forward. She stopped in front of him, her eyes searching for his. He just stood there, opening the door for her, looking at the darkness of the world outside. She swallowed dry and finally walked inside, water dripping into the wooden floor.

She quietly took her sandals off and neatly placed them in the left corner not realizing that that was something she always used to do when she came to visit. That used to be her little corner.

Shikamaru closed the door and turned around to look at her figure. She fights the back the urge to turn around and look back at him. She could feel his intense stare on her, his dark eyes burning into her, setting her whole being on fire.

"Shikamaru." She whispered softly, not knowing how or where to start.

"I know."

The hair of the back of her neck slowly stands up as his hot breath reaches her cheek. Her eyes widened when she felt two strong hands embracing her waist. He rested his chin on her right shoulder making her stomach flutter with infinite butterflies.

"Shika-"She started but he cut her off.

"I was starting to wonder what was taking you so long." He says ever so subtly.

Her heart was in a fury, pounding. She breathed in and out. She could feel him tremble against her. His grip tightened and she fidgeted slightly.

"He's gone…" Shikamaru whispered as his erratic breathing greeted the skin of her neck.

"Shikamaru…" she whispered softly, feeling that it was wrong to speak any louder at that moment.

"But you're here now… thank Kami…" he pressed himself closer to her.

She whimpered slightly at the pressure between their bodies. She closed her eyes as she struggled to turn around. Once she faced him, she gasped as he suddenly fell to his knees. His hands clutched tightly at her legs as though he was scared that she would leave him all by himself.

"Shikamaru…"She opened her eyes to look down at him.

He looked so broken. This was the second time she was watching him cry.

And it was at that very moment that Temari realized that no matter what… that no matter what happened, she'd always be running back at him.

"I… love… you…" He whispered softly, between deep breathes, surprising her.

* * *

_"Did you say it?" He asked as he lightened up another cigarette._

_Shikamaru groaned as he allowed his back to fall onto the grass, "No."_

_Asuma allowed a deep sigh to escape him as he looked up at the bright blue sky, "Shikamaru… you're a smart kid. I was hoping never to… say this to you but… sometimes if you wait too long to say it… someday it might be too late."_

_Shikamaru pouted, glancing sideways at Asuma. He opened his lips to say something but decided against it._

_"You have to make a plan… set a goal and you need to work toward it." Asuma sighed, "Try to take a good look around you every now and then. Drink it in… because this is it." Asuma paused to suck on the cigarette, "Everything might all be gone tomorrow. So next time, when you have the chance-- _**_just say it_**_."_

_"Jeez." Shikamaru said as he closed his eyes, "You don't need to talk like we're all going to die tomorrow."_

_Asuma smiled sadly as he looked down at his student, "We never know." He whispered softly, "We never know what can happen tomorrow."_

* * *

A/N: So I just finished watching Meredith Grey final episode and I somehow had the inspiration to write this. Weird huh? Reviews are highly appreciated. Thanks for reading!


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